Blast from the Past 4 - Head vs. Heart

This series consists of notes that I wrote on facebook in the past. Enjoy reading my thoughts during my college years. Please comment but please be nice! Also please feel free to check out my other Blast from the Past Posts.


From October 2006


Head vs. Heart

I had something deep and inspiring to say but I cannot remember what it was. So maybe if I just keep typing other things it will eventually come back to me. How are you all doing? I know I see a lot of you every day, but most often I do not get to talk to you. So how are you? How are you're classes? Anything exciting in your life? Did you have a lot of midterms?
I'm sitting here in my dorm room all alone. The people who love me are not nearby. I'm pining away for someone who'll stay. Oh I remember! It may not be deep and inspiring, actually, but here is what I was going to say.

Why can't my head and my heart just get along? Why do they have to disagree on just about everything? The main thing that I am thinking about right now is relationships. To be specific, relationships with guys. My heart says that having a romantic relationship would be fun and good, and that is what I really want. My head says that I am not ready, and in need of a relationship right now. I am in my first year of college. I know that what I want to do is finish up college and at least try to do whatever it is that I have decided that I want to do with my life. The reason this conflicts with a relationship is that I feel that dating has a purpose. That purpose is leading towards marriage. I have a feeling, and know that there is a possibility that when I get married I will have kids right away. I have already decided that when I have children I will be a stay at home mom. This would make doing what I have decided to do career wise impossible. Since I think that a 4-8 year dating or engaged relationship is a little long, now would not be the time to start one. My head knows this. My heart is still trying to convince me otherwise.